Your Potatoes Are Lovely
9/19/2012 11:28:00 AM
Deb is an internationally-wanted criminal mastermind. She smuggled this tangerine through customs. That could upset the entire ecosystem of the United States, Deb! It could ruin the fabric of society as we know it! How can she possibly dispose of it? Burn it? Jason must hate America, because somehow he doesn’t think this is a big deal.
The saddest story in the world was told to us today. Deb bought a new Ashton Kutcher camera before her brother’s wedding and took a million pictures while she was there. Then someone borrowed it, and when she got it back, the memory card was acting weird. Eventually she realized that it was empty. Noooo! Now she has to pay a wizard to get the pictures off.
Wednesdays we shine a light on That Guy – the guy (or girl) who does something douchey and either doesn’t realize it or doesn’t apologize for it. Today it was Craps On Everything You Do Guy. Which is definitely Jason. We had a new system installed that ran the radio station today, and Nick went to all this effort so that Jason had all the sound effects he wanted, but Jason just had to point out the one thing he did wrong. Jason says it’s not personal – don’t be fooled into thinking you’re his friend, Nick.
Ever have one of those days where you run out of t-backed underwear and you have to wear your old granny panties that you usually reserve for snowboarding? Well, that’s the situation Deb’s in today. She’s worried everyone can see her underwear outline. Jason agreed that he can, but he likes it that way. And now she’s sitting down forever. Also, just because I like it, and we're talking about underwear:
LET’S TALK TALKIES:
In this game Jason & Deb have to guess an actor based on the things he’s known for, according to IMDb. Today started off pretty slowly, with no one hazarding a guess on the first two actors, but Jason buzzed in right away on Macaulay Culkin being in Home Alone. Then he brought it all home by getting Jack Nicholson in The Shining and The Departed. That’s two weeks in a row Jason “I Don’t Know Movies” Dick has won.
J & D SOFTBALL GAME:
We’re having our annual softball game yet again, this year at the Delle Valley softball fields THIS SATURDAY. It’s bigger than ever, with ACL tickets for the winning team, as well as so many other prizes that we can’t even tell you yet. All the proceeds go to Emancipet, and while we have all the teams that we need, you're welcome to come out and spectate, where you can enter a raffle for prizes. Get all the details here.
PET OF THE WEEK:
Every week we feature a lovely adoptable dog. This week we have a special case: Deb's own foster dog, Princes Piglet, or Piggie, if you prefer. She's extremely sweet-hearted, wanting to lick you all day long, and she comes all ready to go: fixed, trained, and happy. If you’re interested in being the forever home for this beautiful pit, email firstname.lastname@example.org for more information. While you’re at it go to Love-A-Bull and take a look, so we can give some other pups great new homes too.
I LOVE YOU CALL:
At 8:50 Deb calls a random business and tries to get the person answering the phone to say, “I love you.” Today she called Datasavers Data Recovery and talked to Mark. She needs those pictures off of her broken memory card! Mark agreed that he is a wizard and can help, then talked for a really long time to give her the hard sell in paying $600 for it. She’s not sure about that, but she’s sure he gave her an I Love You.
DOES DEB KNOW STUFF (ABOUT FOOTBALL):
Every day we “trivialize” Deb by asking her questions about the game of football, then laughing when she doesn’t know the answers. Today she had Pirates In Football trivia. What teams have a pirate mascot? She did guess it’s the Raiders but couldn’t name the Buccaneers. And somehow she did know that Mike Leach is obsessed with pirates, too. That be amazing, matey! Or something.
Jon Stewart and Bill O’Reilly will be engaging in debate in two weeks in The Rumble In The Air-Conditioned Auditorium 2012.
Michael Turner was arrested after celebrating a win and doing a little drunk driving.