I'm More Fun Than a Baby
7/24/2012 9:23:00 AM
AN ACCIDENT FOR JASON:
Jason’s mother and sister are rooting for Jason to have an accident. And by that, of course, we mean get a girl pregnant. We all know that Jason advocates sex without condoms. No wait, he’s just a big fan of it. Not sure we need any little Jasons running around here.
ROOTING AGAINST PREGNANCY:
Is it wrong to root against your friends who are trying to get pregnant? Jason doesn’t think so. But his reasons are selfish. He doesn’t want them focusing their attention on a baby… it should be on him! Deb pointed out that they’ll be back and they’ll be even better. They always upgrade, and then you get to party in their newer, nicer houses!
Tuesdays we take a look into Deb’s Diary to see what it’s like to be a hot, British chick living in Austin. Deb’s gotten off the healthy food bandwagon, but luckily she was persuaded to turn over a new leaf by one her dear friend Jessica. She suggested to Deb that she keep a food journal. Deb hopes to be back to her old self soon. Now let’s compare her journal to Jason’s…
THE PAPER CUP THIEF:
This morning, Nick #1, our wonderful security guard, brought in two packages of paper cups from upstairs. Why were the cups upstairs? Apparently, people have been stealing them. Who steals paper cups?? Well, that’s not all. Someone is also stealing the plastic forks and spoons.
LET’S TALK TALKIES:
In this game we try to guess who an actor is based on the movies and TV shows he/she is Known For, according to IMDb. After last week’s game, today marked the implementation of a new rule – spelling no longer counts! Despite this change, Deb beat Jason as usual. He even confused A Beautiful Mind with American Beauty. What the?
DOES DEB KNOW STUFF:
Every day we "trivialize" Deb by asking her quiz questions and laughing when she doesn't know the answers. Following today’s discussion about Jason rooting against his friends pregnancies, we asked her trivia questions on movies about unconventional childcare. Deb guessed all three right – Kindergarten Cop, Three Men and a Baby with Ted Danson, and Big Daddy! Childcare for the win.
PET OF THE WEEK:
Every week we feature a lovely adoptable dog. This week we have a special case: Deb's own foster dog, Princes Piglet, or Piggie, if you prefer. She's extremely sweet-hearted, wanting to lick you all day long, and she comes all ready to go: fixed, trained, and happy. If you’re interested in being the forever home for this beautiful pit, email firstname.lastname@example.org for more information. While you’re at it go to Love-A-Bull and take a look, so we can give some other pups great new homes too.
I LOVE YOU CALL:
At 8:50 Deb calls a random business and tries to get the person answering the phone to say, “I love you.” Today, Deb called Detroit Martial Arts and spoke with Vanessa about MMA. After she was put on hold, Deb asked her if there were men like those in Fifty Shades of Grey that went there. This sparked a short conversation on Deb’s non-discriminatory sex life. Apparently this was enough to get a little love from Vanessa.
Fred Willard broke his silence about his conduct in the adult theater. He tweeted saying, “Wait until you hear my version; it’s much more PG.” What about a porn theater is PG?
The Summer 2012 Olympics Opening Ceremony will be this Friday night. The citizens of London are getting a little tired of this Olympic stuff…