Do It In Honor Of Dead Me
5/14/2012 10:03:00 AM
HOT TUB ORGY:
Deb got invited to a pool party yesterday at a house up in Travis Heights. As soon as Jason heard she was hanging out in the hot tub, he immediately thought she had an orgy, but sadly that was not the case. She said they all got into the hot tub to watch the sunset, and it got Deb thinking, “Why does my life suck?” The house she was at was so beautiful, it just made her realize that she lives on the East Side and her backyard smells like dog poo and she’ll never have a house that nice. So kids, make sure you don’t make her mistakes and go to college for something involving numbers or computer programming.
Deb was in the bathroom at the Rangers game and overheard a woman asking for some, uh, feminine hygiene products. Deb knows how that feels, so she offered her a tampon. Then Deb noticed she had her arm around a little girl, and the woman told her it was her first time. Deb sad her heart immediately went out to the girl because not only is that a traumatic experience to begin with, she knows what it’s like for that to happen at the worst possible time. She got hers when she was on holiday in Spain with her family. That's it, if Jason ever has a daughter one day, his mom is babysitting from ages 11-14.
Jason dog sat Blue for Deb while she was out of town this weekend, which came with a lot of rules. He has to be fed and walked, who knew? The most important rule for watching Blue, however, is making sure the blinds are up so he can see out the window. Deb drew the blinds when she dropped off Blue on Friday, but apparently she didn’t raise them high enough because when Jason got home in a drunken stupor Saturday night there were pieces of blinds everywhere. Oops. It’s okay, Deb will come over and tape up a blanket to cover the window.
TRUTH OR PAIR:
In this game you can ask Jason or Deb anything you want, and they can either tell you the Truth or give you a Pair of tickets to that thing you love. Chelsea wanted to know if Deb would have done it with the guy whose hot tub she was hanging out at yesterday. Deb said truth, she wouldn’t have sex with him because he’s a friend. Andy wanted to ask a question so inappropriate, Jason couldn’t even read it on the air. Good job, Andy.
Deb is going surfing in Mexico in six weeks with a friend who just went on the break-up diet, and Deb doesn’t want to look fat next to her, so today she’s starting a diet. That means no bread, limited carbs, no booze — well, less booze.
QUIEN ES MAS MACHO:
Jason will tell you he’s a man’s man’s man, and we put that to the test every Monday by pitting his weekend against a listener’s and seeing whose was mas macho. Listener Johnny went to a crawfish boil, which ended up in some mud wrestling and whiskey drinking. Jason pulled double duty at the station and DJed from 6-10 Friday night then went out to watch What Made Milwaukee Famous perform, where he proved to be the ultimate wingman for Trevin. Saturday was the first annual Dickathalon at Pluckers and then he’s told he went out with Nick that night, and on Sunday he went to play some golf at The Range. The callers unanimously voted Jason mas macho this week, something about mud in the buttcrack just doesn’t scream macho I guess.
I LOVE YOU CALL:
At 8:50 Deb calls a random business and tries to get the person answering the phone to say, “I love you.” Deb spoke to Marcus at Home Blinds of America about getting some replacement blinds for the ones Blue chewed up at Jason’s house. Deb realized she needed to get the measurements for the blinds, but she would call back. Marcus said he hopes she would be there when he went to install the blinds, and they started talking about where they grew up. Deb got an I Love You from him, but she said she felt a little too predatory for comfort.
DOES DEB KNOW STUFF:
Every day we “trivialize” Deb by asking her quiz questions, then laughing when she doesn’t know the answers. Today Deb had a ‘90s one hit wonder audio quiz. She couldn’t remember the name of the band that sang “Steal my Sunshine,” which was Len — whose CD Jason bought back in 1999. She did know that Deee-lite sang “Groove is in the Heart” and Deep Blue Something sang “Breakfast at Tiffany’s.” Deb actually knows that band, and she said the singer is a manager at the Eddie V’s in Dallas now. Or maybe it was the guitarist.
PET OF THE WEEK:
Every week we feature a lovely adoptable dog. This week we're looking for a home for Billie. She's a very sweet puppy whose jaw and pelvis were broken. She’s having surgery on her pelvis and has already had surgery on her jaw, which will be wired shut for 6 weeks while it heals. If you’re interested in adopting Billie, email firstname.lastname@example.org for more information. While you’re at it go to Love-A-Bull and take a look, so we can give some other pups great new homes too.
Over the weekend, 49 bodies turned up on a highway in Monterrey, Mexico, missing their hands, feet and heads.
The LA Clippers eliminated the Grizzlies last night 82-72, and will now face the San Antonio Spurs in a series starting tomorrow.