There’s No Champagne In That Room
4/30/2012 10:20:00 AM
QUIEN ES MAS MACHO:
Jason will tell you he’s a man’s man’s man, and we put that to the test by pitting his weekend against a listener’s and seeing whose was mas macho. Chris changed a transmission in his friend’s truck, played flag football and brought home three girls from a club. Jason was in Vegas this weekend for a wedding and set a new personal spending record at a strip club. He went to the pool on Saturday, where he had his first three-way kiss and had a girl’s nipples in his mouth because he’s a gentleman, or something like that.
Jason wants to know how he spent the last three days in Vegas, but Deb’s the one that sounds terrible this morning. What did she do this weekend? She went to the CrossFit Regionals in San Antonio to cheer on her friends from CrossFit Central and her friend and Jason’s roommate Jeff. She really got into it, and was screaming and cheering for everyone on the 12-person team, which is how her voice got so messed up. Deb’s turned a corner in her relationship with CrossFit; she liked it before, but now she’s really part of the family, she says. This has Jason worried because he thought she was bad enough before she turned the corner.
Nick came in this morning really excited about something. He looked up his name on Urban Dictionary, part of which described him as “Guys are jealous of him, girls don’t get him.” The latter sounds pretty accurate. It turns out Jason is the only name you can spell with months (July, August, September, October, November). It's also used to describe someone with the sexiest voice ever that you could listen to all day. Hey, he'll take that.
TRUTH OR PAIR:
Mondays you get the chance to ask Jason & Deb anything you want, and they can either tell you the Truth or give you a Pair of tickets to that thing you love. Jason wanted to know what the most depraved thing Jason did in Vegas was, which we thought would automatically be a pair. But respecting the integrity of the game, he decided to answer. Thursday night he went to the strip club, and decided to splurge and go into the back room, which he had never done before. But what happened back there? Jason got really uncomfortable answering that, but he said all that happened was she unbuttoned his pants and danced for him, and it was basically a waste of money.
MOMS AT SIX FLAGS:
Alex Son of a Preacher Man took his mom to Six Flags over the weekend. Why would a twenty-something dude take his mom to an amusement park? Because he’s going to be gone for Mother’s Day and this seemed like a good alternative. His mom likes the rides, and they rode a few rollercoasters but then she started to feel sick. They took it easy for a while, and she said she was ready for the next ride. But as soon as they got up, she ended up throwing up in a trashcan. Whoops.
Saturday, May 12th: mark this day in infamy, as it's the first-ever Jason Dick-athalon, brought to you by Pluckers. It's a series of Jason Dick-esque events going on at the Pluckers on S. Lamar starting at 1 PM, including a tricycle race and some tasks that we have to keep secret for now. Winner will get tickets to the 101X shows at Whitewater Rocks - Girl Talk, Ghostland Observatory, and Skrillex. $2 pints of Bud Light even if you don't want to ride a tricycle.
I LOVE YOU CALL:
At 8:50 Deb calls a random business and tries to get the person answering the phone to say, “I love you.” Today Deb called Christie’s Cabaret in Memphis, Tennessee. Deb asked how much they charge for a lap dance, and he said they don’t do those. Oh, is this one of those things where they do it, but can’t say they do it, she asked him? It’s probably something like that, but she got buttslammed.
DOES DEB KNOW STUFF:
Every day we “trivialize” Deb by asking her questions about whatever, then laughing when she doesn’t know the answers. Nick renamed a bunch of NBA teams, so we gave Deb the new name and had her guess the original team name. What’s the real name of the Portland Hipsters? She didn’t know it was the Portland Trail Blazers. What are the Washington Monuments really called? She didn’t know it was the Wizards, which she said was dumb. Amazingly, she did know that the Detroit Robocops are actually the Detroit Pistons, but she had to get at least one.
Last week, a 17-year-old kid crashed and flipped his car in Malibu, but luckily for him he did so right outside of Patrick Dempsey’s house, who heard the crash, grabbed a crowbar and got him out of the car.
PET OF THE WEEK:
Every week we feature a lovely adoptable dog. This week we're looking for a home for Billie. She's a very sweet puppy whose jaw and pelvis were broken. She’s having surgery on her pelvis and has already had surgery on her jaw, which will be wired shut for 6 weeks while it heals. If you’re interested in adopting Billie, email email@example.com for more information. While you’re at it go to Love-A-Bull and take a look, so we can give some other pups great new homes too.
The NBA playoffs are starting and San Antonio Spurs are looking like the best team in the league, beating Utah 106-91 last night.