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JASON & DEB'S BLOG
Why do you want to kill ME?
Posted 10/1/2010 12:26:00 PM
MARRY / F / KILL:

”description”We have had an astoundingly star-studded week of awesome guests, with Jason Schwartzman calling us, then having on the cast of Let Me In, Edward Norton, Doug Benson, Steve-O, and Karl Urban all within the course of a few days.  Not only were they cool celebrities, a few have now wormed their ways into Deb’s heart.  Elias Koteas is her new old-guy crush, since when she complimented him, he said back softly, “Thanks – you’re a beautiful lady.”  And when Edward Norton and Karl Urban were here, Deb pulled what Jason would like to call a jackass move, when she took pictures with them that didn’t have Jason in them.  Here’s one for you, Deb.  Marry/F/Kill – Elias Koteas, Edward Norton, and Karl Urban.  She doesn’t want to kill any of them; can she F them first?  Her immediate choice was to marry Karl Urban, since he seems like just a really good dude, and he’s a Kiwi, so they can bond over being not American.  She decided to kill Edward Norton, since he’s had a good run, and Elias Koteas might work a little harder in bed, since he may not have had as much quality sack time as Edward.  What about one for Jason:  OU Girl, A&M Girl, and Alabama Girl?  F the Alabama girl (there are a few cute ones over there), then obviously kill the OU girl, and marry the A&M girl.  She’s from Texas, at least; he can convert her.  A listener then suggested one for Alex Son of a Preacher Man:  She-Hulk, Batgirl, and Wonder Woman.  He’d have to kill She-Hulk, since she’d tear him apart (literally); bone Wonder Woman, since the Amazonian marriage rites are too strenuous; and he would wheel Babs wherever she wanted to go into their old age.  I apologize.  This has officially jumped the shark.

THE EYES OF TEXAS:

As a final salute today to encourage Jason about the UT-OU game this weekend, Deb did her best version of “The Eyes of Texas.”  By memory.  It started out strong, then almost immediately petered out to her best lyrical guesses, which involved the Eyes of Texas watching you on all the Saturdays, especially ones that involve OU.  Deb, if you sang that in the stands, you would be pelted in the head with bottles, fists, and babies.

C OF THE WEEK:

”description”On Fridays Deb calls the one person who’s ruined her week the worst word in the world – the C word.  There are two kinds of C’s, though:  either the worst guy in the world or someone who does something silly and deserves a laugh.  When DJ Penis Guy Intern Nick found out that he’s the C of the Week, he hoped it was the latter.  Deb can’t quite decide, either.  While Nick is extremely competent 90% of the time, there is that 10% where he messes up, and that number’s been on the rise this week.  There are some structural changes that have been made to the show, so we’ve been playing around with how we podcast, and some people are not happy with it.  Not only did the podcast change, but yesterday’s 9 o’clock hour wasn’t available at all.  Whoops.  Nick and Alex Son of a Preacher Man are now gonna be responsible for making it up to the people they ruin stuff for.  Nick is gonna have to drive over to listener Michael’s house and clean his windows for screwing up the podcast this week.  I don’t know how that’s a fair trade.

CAR JACKASSERY:

Jason got pulled over yesterday.  His registration sticker expired last year, and when a cop pulled up behind him at a red light, ran his plates, and saw that he hadn’t re-upped his registration, he wrote Jason a little ticket.  Jason says this is why people don’t like the cops.  Here’s the thing, though:  there’s real crime out there this cop could be stopping.  Jason was stopped two blocks from his house and one from a crack house!  Deb replied, sensibly:  hey, Jason, you were in the wrong.  You deserve to be caught.  We need registration (and, now, ticket) money to keep our city running.  Be a patriotic Austinite, Jason!

MORNINGX MAILBOX:

About a year ago, Deb opened what she thought was a piece of fan mail but found inside a pile of what have to be pubic hairs.  So freaking gross.  So since then she’s had interns open all the mail she gets at the station.  That didn’t keep her from getting something pretty interesting today, though.  In an unmarked envelope, there was a flash drive and no note saying, “These are some songs from my band,” or even, “These are pictures of me shaving my pubes.”  Even if it’s something like that, she’d still like a little warning.  Alex Son of a Preacher Man was worried because he just saw a movie at Fantastic Fest where a girl gets a mysterious DVD and it turns out it was a video of her being murdered in the future.  Deb doesn’t want to be murdered!  Whose computer was going to be the test dummy?  At first we volunteered the old guy station across the hall, but Jason couldn’t wait and just stuck it in.  His computer, obviously.  What started playing was a 17 second movie, with a baby walking across a room - it looked just like Deb’s living room with her giant couch! – which then flashed some crazy images of someone screaming and being attacked.  Caller Andrew said that he can help Deb out – he’s got a spare bed in his house that she can use this weekend.  Don’t do it, Deb!  Andrew’s gonna murder you and send this USB drive back to your mailbox from the future!

CHANCE MOCK:

Former Longhorn quarterback Chance Mock comes in the studio to break down the UT games from time to time, but he was pretty hesitant to come in today, since Deb said, in Marry/F/Kill, that she’d kill Chance – what’s up with that?  She just doesn’t want to break up his marriage.  Now, Chance, console Jason, who has very reluctantly predicted Oklahoma is gonna win this weekend’s game 17-13.  Here’s Chance’s thing:  he’s watched Oklahoma all season, and they’ve only played one good game; he’s watched UT, and they haven’t done well at all this season, either.  But after this last week’s beatdown from UCLA, things might be a little different.  OU is gonna be a little complacent, and UT has just gotten a wake-up call.  They just had someone come into their house, beat them up, and now they’re gonna come back swinging.  He’ll be a homer and predict Texas pulling it out with a final score of 24-14.  Actually that’s kind of exciting to Jason; the fact that they’re pumped up is pumping him up.  But not in that way, dude.  Don’t be gross.  Check out moxgear.com or actionsportsshop.com to get some fine sporting gear from this fine sportsman.

IGNITE A DREAM:

Our buddy Chance Mock will be hanging out at the Ignite A Dream Golf Classic this upcoming Wednesday, October 6th.  It kicks off at 8 AM, and the great thing is that it benefits a fantastic cause.  Ignite a Dream is an organization that raises money to help underprivileged kids get opportunities to play organized sports.  It keeps them off the streets and on the field, which is definitely cool.  Come hang out with him and 101X on Wednesday, and get more information by checking out igniteadream.com.

DENNIS DE LA PENA:

Every week we talk to a real sports expert, Dennis De La Pena from Fox 7 Sports.  Earlier Jason picked OU to win this weekend, and he’s sad to do it, so he needs someone to convince him that he’s wrong.  Unfortunately Dennis cannot be that guy.  The only good news is that OU isn’t looking too good this season, either.  So you’re saying there’s a chance.  If you want to see if you can predict the winners of this weekend's football games better than Dennis, go to myfoxaustin.com, and while you're looking at Fox this weekend, check out some MLB action on Saturday, then the Redskins at Philly on Sunday.

I LOVE YOU CALL:

At 8:45 Deb calls a random business and tries to trick the person answering the phone into saying, “I love you.”  Today we called Chacho’s, a Mexican food place in Houston, where Lola answered the phone.  Do they do breakfast tacos to go?  They have the Mexicana, which doesn’t have any meat in there, and you can add avocado to anything you want.  Deb said she’d ask around the office and get them an order of 10 or 20 tacos.  Is that gonna take long?  Lola says that’s nothing.  You know what Lola won’t say, though?  “I love you.”  Well, at least Deb got 1.5 I Love Yous this week.  That’s something.

HANG OUT WITH JASON AND DEB:

We have got your opportunity to get up close and personal (but not too personal … or close) to Jason and Deb this weekend.  Deb will be at Fadó Irish Pub tonight, from 10-12, for their Fadoktoberfest celebration.  They're throwing a birthday party for themselves, and you're invited, with bratwurst eating, chiken dance, and stein-holding contests with lots of cool prizes, including a chance at $5000.  How can you beat that?  She’ll also be at Bebe Paluzza at the Palmer Events Center on Sunday with our old friend Sorority Intern from 11AM – 1PM.  Get more information at bebepaluzza.  Join Jason at Double Dave’s on Metric to watch the UT game with some sweet $1 Bud Light drafts and $1 Pep’roni Rolls, starting at 2 PM.  Get more information about that here.

DOES DEB KNOW STUFF (ABOUT FOOTBALL):

Every day we “trivialize” Deb about the game of football, then laugh when she doesn’t know the answers.  Today we had UT football traditions trivia.  What’s the name of the UT cannon fired when they score a touchdown?  Her guess was Big Bertha, but that’s not it.  Close, though, since that’s the name of one of UT’s giant drums.  Smokey is the correct answer.  “The Eyes of Texas” is set to the tune of what song?  “Working on the Railroad” was her guess, which was close enough to get her credit.  When singing that song, participants traditionally do what?  “Throw them horns up!” is absolutely the correct answer.  And when she demonstrated, it wasn’t even that bad of a Hook ‘Em.  Who saw that coming?

REWIND: FATHER DAWN:

Our resident questionably-religious figure, Father Dawn, comes in to pray for the Longhorns or whatever’s in his drug-addled brain.  Yesterday he of course prayed for the game against the Oklahoma Sinners.  He has one piece of advice for the players:  do NOT have sex with Oklahomans.  Don’t make the same mistake he’s made.  They’re all one of two things:  super fat (eating every deep-fried thing the State Fair has to offer) or super skinny (read: meth).  Father Dawn did it with an Oklahoma meth girl once, and it didn’t work out too well.  She just ended up crying that she “just wanted to make it snow” – and believe the good Father, she made it snow.  Sleet even.  Deb wondered if he often makes girls cry afterward.  It’s about half and half – some cry after, some cry during.

SPORTS:

Oklahoma State beat the little Aggies’ hearts last night with a 38-35 victory.  

The UT-OU game is this weekend.  Are you ready?  Jason’s predicting OU with a 17-13 victory.  He would love someone to talk him out of that.

NEWS:

Greg Giraldo, the hilarious comedian, passed away two days ago after being in the hospital for five days because of an accidental overdose.  It’s now been released that, because doctors could not bring him out of the coma he had slipped into, his family decided to pull the plug.

Police responded to an alarm around I-35 and William Cannon this morning, where two individuals were attempting to rob a Big Lots.  Shots were fired by one suspect as he was trying to make an escape, and when police returned fire, he was actually shot and killed.  Police were pursuing the other suspect, and the officer involved in the shooting has already been placed on administrative leave.  Why these dudes were trying to rob a Big Lots is anybody’s guess.
Posted By: Son of a Preacher Man  
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